BodyLogos Blog

Rings of Engagement

Five-days beaching with Anthony at the Jersey Shore led us to rings of engagement. Two floating rings—a silver ring for friendship; a gold ring for love—now hang from our ears. We’re engaged in a 1614 Corinthian quote, “All that we do be done in (friendship and) love.”

The playful division of an earring pair on the Asbury Boardwalk expanded into a conversation around what to call them. As we walk away with our purchase I say, “we have friendship-earrings!” pause… “They’re like wedding rings,” Anthony shouts. I reply with, “Well, how about engagement rings.”

Together we engaged in all that Asbury offered: waves, sand and salt air; food, cocktails and classic cars; Springsteen, The Stone Pony and Frank’s Diner. We brought friendship and love everywhere we went. People commented on the delight they experienced through us.

Then after check out, on our final stroll through the boardwalk boutiques, a bracelet caught Anthony’s eye engraved with our Corinthian quote. We begin our trek back to NYC with the bracelet in tow, delighted by our journey’s magical unfolding.

Our first vacation, without friends as chaperones, united us in the principles of friendship and love, symbolized through jewelry.

Not with traditional rings wrapped around fingers that lead to promising your SELF to another. But rather, rings floating from ears that lead to promising your FRIENDSHIP and LOVE to another. A code of conduct versus a promise of coveting.

We returned home just in time for my 60th birthday party. I’m surrounded by old and new friends. I realize that every relationship in the room has asked me to stretch my SELF to honor friendship.

These relationships have stood the test of time and change. These friendships all carry the unspoken ‘silver’ promise to align in the best interest of each other with respect for differences. This promise makes for deep friendships that don’t need day to day tending. And, can survive months or years of distance without dissolving.

I think about the principles of love and what is the unspoken ‘gold’ ring promise?

Different from friendship, I think that love reflects an interest in day to day tending?

Wanting to engage with each other in the mundane to grow; rising above fears to engage with each other as individuals to mature; and, living free to frolic in life just for fun, to keep birthing depth into unity.

Perhaps, love asks us to stretch our SELF beyond respecting differences, to find the common ground within differences. This promise makes for a union that evolves each individual into their life purpose. A purpose with wings that fly beyond our union to offer our light to the world.

Our silver and gold pirate-like rings dangle with the delight of choosing one another to help sculpt us into our greatness.

This is about allowing our self to be touched, changed and elevated by another.

Dr. Ruth and me. Steve Friendman photo

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Redefining Strength

I want to change our perception of strength. Strength is the ability to meet resistance and influence an outcome without compromising ourselves. And we already have it.

Strength is not an attribute; it’s a state of being. Gladiators, bodybuilders, and football players demonstrate strength through brute force, sheer willpower, muscle mass, and relentless pursuit. But we’re also quick to identify dancers and martial artists as strong. Their medium taps into a sense of vulnerability, balance, alignment, controlled power, and grace—but no one can deny their strength. Strength may look different on each of us, but it is an inherent part of who we are.

You are not weak by nature; you are stronger than you think. Your strength is not something you need to kill yourself to gain—it is already within you, waiting to be excavated. The key is to stop chasing something you already have and tap into it, so you can manifest that strength in your everyday life.

Because we don’t think we’re strong, we approach resistance with the idea that we’re not enough. We throw everything we have at it and push past our physical, mental, and emotional limitations. We see strength as domination, but it’s not.

When you learn to listen to your body’s divine wisdom, you cultivate a sense of where your body is developing tension instead of standing in its strength. You end the vicious cycle of unrealistic expectations, injury, and self-criticism and learn how to consciously embrace responsible growth. You stop compartmentalizing your strength into emotional, physical, and mental pieces and operate from the strength of your being at all times.

You learn how to align yourself with gravity—instead of working against it—so you can channel your strength to meet life’s resistance. As you meet resistance with equal parts power and alignment, you transform tension into strength

As in the sword dance above, the power lies in bringing just the right amount of force—not too little and not too much. By meeting the sword’s weight, I meet gravity. I am tapped into a larger source of energy, free of tension, and discover a strength that is wholly and uniquely mine.

About Tammy Wise

Tammy Wise is a widely respected mind-body fitness expert based out of New York City, owner of BodyLogos, Inc. author of The Art of Strength: Sculpt the Body ~ Train the Mind. A former Broadway dancer turned Tao minister, Tammy was voted the Best of Fitness by Time Out New York and has appeared in Martha Stewart’s Whole Living magazine, New York Magazine, Natural Health, Shape, and Thrive Global. She’s a Transformational Authors Contest Winner and regular contributor to Honeysuckle magazine and Medium. Visit her at bodylogos.com.

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